My life is a vast ghetto littered with neotolkien elves, eight-barrel rocket launchers, endless hordes of faceless muscle-bound goons, armor-cum-lingerie, the seven artifacts of the evil overlord, a billion overacted cut scenes, terrorists-du-jour, neogeiger aliens, hovertanks, troglodytes, vampires, and +7 potions of healing; all set in a neo-post-industrial steam-cyberpunk castle with teleportals and elevators and platform puzzles in every room. there i am an undercover half-ogre sorcerer carrying a vorpal six-barrel chain gun while riding a harley into the roman coliseum to battle a cyborg lion controlled by a ghost emperor, which is actually a time traveling nanobot AI, battling for domination over a fictional kingdom that exists only in the minds of mutant siamese twins.
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